When children lack eye contact, it’s often regarded as one of the early signs of autism, a neurodevelopmental condition that affects a person’s social interaction, communication, and behavior.
Lack of eye contact is frequently mentioned in papers about autism in young children as a red flag but has become increasingly less important as an identifier.
Eye Contact As An Early Identifier Of Autism
Babies don’t automatically look at someone’s eyes because making eye contact is a learned behavior.
Learning the value of looking at a person’s eyes from experience, neurotypical children take on this behavior as they grow and develop by turning to look at someone when their name is called, or by looking at facial expressions to give context to a situation.
In contrast, autistic children have not learned how to use eye contact as a means of social communication and often don’t look at others when they need to get their attention or need something.
How Eye Contact and Autism Are Related
Although many autistic adults appear to make good eye contact, some of them have been evaluated and told they can’t be autistic because they are making eye contact.
But this could be due to masking. Autistic adults learn through therapy, by trial and error, watching and imitating others, and they learn behavior by observing that eye contact is vital in a neurotypical society.
Whether they were punished for not looking at a face as a child, or heard that people who don’t make eye contact are lying, autistic adults didn’t want to be seen as being untruthful and sometimes start making intense eye contact with others.
This can be uncomfortable and is usually experienced as too much.
For many people, eye contact may not appear much different in autistic adults superficially, as the internal experience of eye contact differs vastly. Some people think about eye contact constantly and use it as part of a checklist for social interactions.
Still, for others, it can vary between slightly uncomfortable and intensely uncomfortable. The latter often comes off as too intimate and exposing. Masking is a conscious, deliberate process for many autistic adults, but others internalize it, making it difficult to recognize.
Making Eye Contact Doesn’t Mean Someone Isn’t Autistic
An autistic adult comfortable with their diagnosis may choose intentional masking or unmasking- choosing not to make eye contact.
In recent years, several providers that work with autistic children have put less emphasis on eye contact, given that it is so difficult and uncomfortable for adults.
When an autistic person makes eye contact, it is almost always to blend in with neurotypical others and make neurotypical people around them feel more comfortable.
When some autistic people have become more comfortable with a diagnosis and focus on intentionally unmasking, they may consciously choose not to make eye contact. This is another reason why the trend to put less emphasis on eye contact has become more prevalent.
